Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

Everyone should read this book! And please, let me qualify that statement by adding that I don't say that often. I can usually keep a sober judgment about a book; I try to discern whom among my friends would like it and whom wouldn't. So I don't speak carelessly when I say, again, everyone should read this book!

I found it by a chance encounter in Barnes and Noble. The title interested me, I picked it up and read the back cover, table of contents, sat down, read the introduction and 1st chapter and I was hooked. I had no idea who Elizabeth Gilbert was until I read on the cover that she also penned Eat, Pray, Love, which, again, I knew very little about, except for what the cover looked like and that it was a best-seller. Irrelevant.

Committed is essentially two books in one: informal, yet well-researched musings on the history of marriage, interspersed with a personal narrative about previously-divorced Gilbert's journey towards remarriage with a Brazilian man named Felipe, also previously divorced. Though serious about their relationship, neither had any intentions to legally tie the knot ever again, until their hand was forced by immigration issues with Felipe. Gilbert decided she wanted to do it right, so in the 10-month process of waiting for all the paperwork to be processed before they could marry, Gilbert decided to at least try to come to terms with the whole institution, in both an intellectual sense and an emotional sense.

The reason that EVERYONE needs to read this, or at least almost everyone, is because almost everyone is married or is contemplating marriage at some point in the future, and the wisdom that Gilbert finds in her journey is inspiring, beautiful, and practical. The historical/cultural sections are well-handled, engagingly-written, and delightfully educational. Not to mention the fact that the story of "Felipe and Lizzie" that looms behind it all is as sweet as anything I've read.

The primary reason I like this book can be found in the subtitle: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage. In many ways, marriage is being increasingly devalued in our country. You could call me a skeptic, as I struggle with the idea myself. Such a long commitment. Such an enormous responsibilty! Thoughts such as these cast a shadow over whatever romantic aspirations might arise in me from time to time. To watch Gilbert come to the conclusions that she does, without the aid of a Bible or pastors telling her the way things are "supposed" to be, is, for me, an ultimate affirmation of this ancient institution. Rather than simply allowing wisdom to rain down on her in the form of divine revelation, she digs deep for it, and I appreciate the sweat that went into finding that wisdom and refining it into the gem that is this book. Read it.